A TESTIMONIAL OF GOD’S FAITHFULNESS IN THE MIDST OF THE STORMS OF  LIFE
Submitted by Bertha Sollenberger Crider Heisey – June 2005 

I don’t come to you as a public speaker.  I come only to bear witness to the saving power of Jesus Christ, and the faithfulness of God to fulfill His promises to His redeemed children.

I’d like to read Psalms 145 because it so well expresses my attitude toward God and His workings in my life.

First let me go back in time to the fall of 1937.  At the age of 14, I went to Messiah Academy at Grantham, PA. as a freshman.  The only incident of that first day of school that I can recall was seeing Paul Crider for the first time.  He was a Junior, from Abilene, Kansas and I from Chambersburg.  As time went on we became casual friends – so imagine my surprise and thrill when in the Spring he invited me to be his guest at the Male Chorus Banquet.  An invitation to this banquet was an honor every girl secretly wished for.  From that small beginning a romance developed which brought us to the marriage altar in the spring of 1944 after six years of courtship.

We lived in Rhode Island for two years following our marriage.  Upon our return to Chambersburg, my parents built us a house next door to their home in Culbertson.  It was just following the war and it was very difficult to get appliances and cars.  In the summer of 1947 we were still waiting for furnishings for our house.  We did get a new car.  A son, Paul Douglas, arrived to bless our home.

What more could anyone desire?  Here I was, just 24 years of age.  I had a wonderful husband, a new home next door to my parents, furnishings arriving as available, a new car, a precious son and surrounded by love and kindness.  "But would you believe it" – to put it in a modern day expression, I had a problem.  I did not have a constant assurance that I was ready to meet God in case the rapture took place or that I would die.  I had fear – a tormenting fear at times.  Together, Paul and I often prayed that I would receive this assurance.  I lived a good life – a clean life, and professed to be a Christian.  I believe now that I was a Christian but somehow I failed to claim my position in Christ.  At any rate, it was of no small concern to me.  I had to know that I was right with God so I prayed, “Lord, I must know that I am your child at any price.”  Today, I know that I am His child.  I have been redeemed by the blood of Jesus Christ that was shed for me. 

At any rate, things did begin to happen in my life.  In April on the first day of fishing season, we had an automobile accident, greatly damaging our new car.  I had my head resting on Paul’s shoulder and was holding our son, Douglas.  Paul was driving and also went to sleep although we were in sight of our destination – hitting a concrete bridge.  My jaws hit the steering wheel and were broken in five places.  My front teeth were broken off.  Paul was unharmed. Douglas was released from the hospital after one day.  Complications made the healing of my jaws a long drawn-out process and on the evening of July 2, we made arrangements with the Chambersburg Hospital for further surgery. 

Life seemed rather heavy and as we were getting ready for bed that night we were talking of our situation when I said, “Well, Honey I feel that I can go through anything as long as I have you to go through it with me.  If you were taken from me, I’d hibernate the rest of my life.”  Paul turned to me and said in surprise, “Honey, I’m disappointed.  I wish your faith in God would be so strong that you could accept whatever happens as God’s will for your life. Look at my parents.  No two people loved each other more than they,  yet when father died, mother accepted it as God’s will and went steadfastly on her way.” 

My father had a silo business.  Within just a day or two, my mother and a neighbor came knocking on my front door, both looking very grave.  They informed me that there had been an accident on the job where Paul worked and he was seriously injured and was in the Hanover Hospital, and I needed to go to the hospital as soon as possible.  I went and was there until he died, four days later.  He never regained consciousness.  He didn’t need to.  God had gone before and arranged that Paul would give me his parting message within the calm and quiet of home.  “Have faith in God, that no matter what happens, you will know it is God’s will for your life.”  My heart is deeply moved when I realize the graciousness and love of God that he had gone before and just provided for something he knew I would greatly need.  Oh, how I love Him. 

But that did not erase the pain, the heartbreak, and the disappointment that followed.  Life was so empty – nothing to live for.  I wanted to die – but here was this fear to meet God.  As a result, I began seeking God as I had never done before – confessing out everything I felt God may not be pleased with in my life.  The biggest and hardest thing was jealousy.  It looked like an impossible monster but I did it.  I wanted to die and no price was too great.  I cleaned house, everything until I felt completely emptied.  My physical body even felt completely emptied, as if it were only a shell.  Do you know that song? - “Bring your empty earthen vessels, cleaned through Jesus' precious blood, Come ye needy one and all”.  That was me.  I came to God in a way that I had never done before.  I was as clean and empty of self as I knew how.  I felt this need to be filled now that I was empty.  It was on the evening of August 10, 1947 (Just 4 weeks after Paul’s death) that I presented myself to God and asked Him to fill my empty shell.  God so surprised me and filled my shell with an overflowing love, joy, peace, contentment, and security that I never knew existed.  It was a gift because all I was seeking for was an assurance that I was ready to meet God.  I had wanted to die, I didn’t want to live.  I only wanted to be able to ask God to please take me and my son to heaven.  But a whole new life opened up to me.  Now I no longer wanted to die.  I wanted to live. There seemed to be so much to live for.  God in His graciousness opened doors of service to me that made my life rich and fulfilling.  And, oh, how I enjoyed my dear little son.  I had so much to live for.

Let me share still another experience to show how gracious God is to His children.  We are not left to bear our burdens alone.  He goes before and prepares the way.

In 1956 I remarried.  To this union were born four children.  At the time of this incident in 1966 we were living on the 52-acre Willow Spring Farm near Mt. Holly Springs, Pa. The farm had a pond located in the front lawn as part of the landscape, approximately 100 feet from the house.  Our four children ranged in ages from 9 years to 6 months. Our 2-year-old was what we called the clown of the family.  He provided the entertainment and quickly became the center of attention at meal time, play time and even work time.

The weekend of Oct. 8-9, my husband, Orville Heisey, and I planned to go out to Ohio to attend the centennial celebration of Grandpa Heisey’s church.  Taking a 2-year-old and 6-month-old baby to Ohio for a weekend of services looked difficult so we made arrangements to leave them with friends at Grantham.  When Adriel and Brenda learned of the arrangement, they immediately protested going without Nathan, the two-year-old, saying, “we’d have no fun”.  So it was decided to take Nathan with us.  So as not to disappoint the girls who were looking forward to having our two little ones, we left Frances with them.  Little did we know this would be our last weekend with Nathan.  We had a wonderful time.  But on our way home Sunday evening, we passed an auto accident.  People were lying stretched out on the grass by the side of the road, covered with sheets, etc.  It was a tragic sight and having experienced an auto accident myself, it really affected me.  As we drove on, I can’t say if I slept and dreamed, or what it was.  It was something more than just thinking – more like a vision.  But what I saw were the Heiseys and Sollenbergers assembled in the basement of a church waiting to be ushered into the sanctuary for a funeral and thinking that never have the two families been assembled for a funeral. 

We arrived home late Sunday night.  Nathan was tired the next day, when about 4:00 PM he wanted to go outdoors.  It was a bit chilly so I stood him on the kitchen table to put his flannel shirt and cap on him.  He gave a great big yawn and I took him in my arms and said, "Oh, Mother should be putting you to bed instead of letting you go outdoors".  But it would soon be suppertime so I let him go out.  Then I got Frances, our six-month-old, up from her nap and got her ready to sit outdoors in her little seat to be entertained by Nathan.  It apparently took me longer to do this than I was aware of because when I finally put her out, I couldn’t find Nathan anywhere.  I frantically called and searched.  Yes, he had found his way to the pond.  I spied his little shirt inflated like a bubble floating on the water.  I ran into the water and got him, carried him to the neighbor living at the end of our lane.  I flagged a car and asked him to get a doctor right away.

Orville, my husband, had gone to Bucknell University for the day and wouldn’t be home until 8 or 9 o’clock.  There was just no way to reach him but I desperately sought to do so.  The doctor came and pronounced Nathan dead.  When he asked me who we wanted for an undertaker, they were shocking words. I resisted allowing them to take my child, saying they can’t have him, especially with Orville not even being there.  But they took him.  Even to this day, I can say that was the worst night of my life. Grief is something you must experience to understand the weight of that word.  I experienced grief that night.  My chest felt as if it was filled with sandpaper rubbing against itself.  It hurt, it pained.  I felt I couldn’t endure it.  Finally toward morning the scene that came to me on our way home from Ohio came to my mind and, for the first time, I realized that for the Heiseys and the Sollenbergers to be assembled for a funeral, the death would have to be in Orville’s and my family.

God used that vision to show me that this was His doings.  On the day of the funeral there we were, the two families brought together just as I had seen it on the way home from Ohio.  That first night when I began to see that God again had gone before to tell me He was in control – a drop of oil was dropped into my chest.  I can’t describe the comfort it brought, ever so delicate and gentle but, oh so soothing.  As the days passed, more drops of oil were administered, bringing the comfort that God has promised to those who mourn.  We had questions – why? why? why? 

Finally, with God’s help we began to see that Nathan was a special gift to us for two years.  His life was not snuffed out – it wasn’t shortened.  He lived his full allotted time and our home was the chosen one to be blessed by his earthly visit. 

          God is so wonderful to us in providing all that we need through Jesus Christ and the precious Holy Spirit who abides in us.

Thanks to Bertha Heisey for sharing this story for this website.
Thanks to Bob Francis of Sollenberger Silos for sharing the farm picture with the silo.